While my Derby persona may be dying on black and white doesn't mean that I am. Voluptuous Vixen is here and she will grace the track with her sexy and dangerous curves again sometime soon. I have been looking at this the wrong way, I'm being way too negative about this. While I'm being all pissy and pouty the fact of the matter is that I WILL be back. its not like I'm out because of an injury I'm on a forced hiatus. its not like I cant skate and self motivate myself. My first derby wife Midnight is going through the same thing, we are both forced to take a break but we will be back just not now. I need to take this time to work on the things that I can fix instead of just jumping into it. my old coach Ember kind of rushed us into getting ready for our season and most of us still weren't ready when it started. as much as she talked shit about BCR she could have a taken a few notes on how to run a team. not only was on skates training import but off skates as well. yes the bitch gave us a workout log but nothing that was super beneficial to our endurance. in these past months i have watched my other derby wife become pretty bad ass. shes stronger and faster. her endurance is WAY better than when she left Belles. But the thing is this she made herself get this way because of her determination. I am not the best self motivator, i like having someone with me cuz it sucks doing things alone. i was always a lazy broad. but when derby came along it gave me something to look forward to and be good at. and I personally think its time to take away my excuses. I think I should be using this time to work my back muscles up to where they need to be. Helley did it without me she was hell bent on getting better and did what it took to be a better skater. I have never been more proud of my wife and i KNOW she is gonna get better with time and BCR's training. they have help mold her into a bigger beast than what i left her with. I may not be skating with a team but I will do my part and work on the things I can fixed that way when I can join BCR I wont feel like a total fat ass. I always seem to slack on shit and for once I want to go to practice and not have to sit down because I'm winded and hurting because of my fucking back. SOOOOOO its officially time to quit the bitchin and try and do something about it....just saying. Im bitching about not being motivated when all the motivation i NEED has been right in my face all along......HELLEY!!!! just last year around this time I was recovering from a breast reduction and hoping I could be one of those hard hitting girls.....NEWSFLASH BITCHES!!!! I am a hard hitting mother fucker!!! lol and I will be better than I was before. til then ppl this voodoo vixen will be brewing a lil something for ya'll
Voluptuously yours,
Vix♥
All you need is the motivation. The want. The need. The drive. The desire.
ReplyDeleteI've seen it in you many times. Times when you ignored the pain of your back while you bouted because your team needed you out there.
But forget about them for just a moment. What do you want for you? Do you want to be a hard-hitting beast who is every jammer's nightmare? That girl that everyone groans to see on the track?
Do it. Be it. You're the only one who can mold yourself into that person. I love you and I want to see you succeed. I can yell encouragement, I can help you tie the rope, but you have to climb the mountain yourself.
Be what you are with your family - a strong woman who does what's right. Take care of yourself like you care for your family. Derby is good for your health. Committing to being good at the sport means committing to regular exercise, to dealing with health problems, to eating better. All of those things will make you feel like a million bucks, and those things will pay off like nobody's business when you get back out on that track for real.
I never forget about you and Midnight when I'm out there. I miss you both more than I can say. But you're part of my motivation. I skate hard because you can't anymore. I hit hard because you can't anymore. And when you CAN do it again, we will be a force to be reckoned with. We will be re-goddamn-diculous.
Side note, I'm starting Couch to 5K soon if you want to join in. I know you hate running. I loathe it too. But I'm going to learn to do it because I know it's good for me.